When we wake up in the morning on any given day, we have our plans for what we want to accomplish in the day. Yet, there always seem to be surprises that we did not plan nor expect. Sometimes those moments are horrendously painful and some are ridiculously exciting.

Yesterday, two moments definitely fell in the latter category.

First, I was approached in October about being interviewed by Portraits Magazine in connection with the Francis Chan event Crash was hosting. I got a text message from a friend with the picture of the cover attached. I had forgotten about the interview and article, so it was fun to go online and read it and get messages from friends as they got home and found a picture of Francis Chan and I looking them in the face. You can check out the cover and article here. Props to my friend Tony Elliott at Conspyr Media for the awesome pictures Portraits used in the piece.

Second, I got a Facebook message and voicemail from a Channel 12 News producer, who saw the article I posted on my Facebook on Sunday regarding Tim Tebow and Ben Rothlisberger’s respective faith journey. She wanted to send a photographer to me to get my take on Tebow’s “miraculous” game involving the number 316. So, my friend Kelly Young came out and watched as I was interviewed outside the auditorium at NPHX’s campus. The final video of my interview is available here.

All in all, it was a fun and newsworthy day. For a lot of reasons. Now that Monday is behind us though, my focus is on this weekend when I will be speaking in the morning and evening services at NPHX. I hope you can join us this Sunday at 10:30 am or 6pm. You can get more info on those gatherings here.

My interview on Channel 12 News re: Tebow 3:16

Betrayal is a universal human experience. We know the sting of being hurt by someone we trusted. We all know the feeling of being wounded by a family member or friend. If we were honest, we all have at least one person we find it difficult to forgive.

Many of us refuse to forgive. But refusing to forgive someone is like drinking poison and expecting them to die. Un-forgiveness is toxic. It destroys us.

So, how do make the move from bitterness to forgiveness? How do we overcome the contradiction we live as forgiven people who won’t forgive?

In this next series at Crash, we will step into that internal conversation and challenge each other to rethink what we have been taught and believed about relationships and forgiveness. We will explore why we must forgive and how to take the first step in that journey. We will also seek to understand what consequences remain, even after forgiveness has taken place. This is not a simple matter; it is incredibly messy.

Ever hear someone talk and feel like they are just full of it? Yeah, well, I am glad you know the sound of my voice.

In the last few months, I have blogged, shared with friends and discussed the significant value of feedback. I said, “Feedback is the breakfast of champions.” I told a coworker that she could Gibbs-slap be in the back of the head if/when I bristled at feedback. I was the feedback cheerleader for a while there (sans pom-poms and ruffled skirt, thank you Jesus!). 

Then, today, I got some feedback that was a “jagged pill to swallow” (to quote a friend). At first, the feedback was something I had a hard time understanding what to do with. So, I shared that with my friend. After a larger discussion, his feedback was clarified. And I was crushed. Honestly. Crushed. The feedback shot straight to an area where I intentionally never want to find myself. Yet, here I am.

Later in the day, I received feedback from another source that was hard to swallow as well. I realized an area where I have really dropped the ball and missed opportunities.

As I struggled to come to terms with this new clarity, I found myself thinking, “this breakfast is gross!” I realized I like certain kinds of feedback and didn’t like it when others resisted feedback, triggering my little “we all need feedback” cheer. But listening, really trying to hear the people who were close to me share from their perpective, that was not as delicious as a bowl of Lucky Charms or Eggs Benedict or French Toast or even my friend Adam’s Diggby Sandwich. 

photo courtesy of www.sxc.hu/1285567

In 2012, you and I have something in common. We are going to face some stuff that is gonna be tough and we will want to run away. Or hide. Or deny it and live in fantasy land. Often what we need though is what scares us or threatens us the most. What we do in that moment changes everything about our future.

What am I doing with my feedback? I am trying to focus on what I can control and what I can change. I am looking for one thing I can do in each area to get the ball rolling in a positive direction. Dani talked me down off the proverbial ledge last night and I’m deciding to treat these areas as opportunities, not crises. I am doing my best to turn the hope knob, not the fear one (for some friends who remember that image). 

Just because something sucks doesn’t mean you don’t need it. Sometimes the pain has a purpose. Sometimes the words that are hardest to hear are the ones we need to heed the most.

(I do my best to not make this blog “Scott’s personal journal on his life experiences” but I believe I’m not alone here. And if I have company, I would love to hear about your story in the comment section). 

Each day holds a surprise. But only if we expect it can we see, hear, or feel it when it comes to us. Let’s not be afraid to receive each day’s surprise, whether it comes to us as sorrow or as joy. It will open a new place in our hearts, a place where we can welcome new friends and celebrate more fully our shared humanity. 

-Henri Nouwen

I feel like I came out of hiding in 2011. My mentor and friend, Maxie Burch, spent the first part of 2011 in Canada and then moved to Arkansas this summer. We spent a week or so together in Zambia, but beyond that, this was the first year in our friendship that we haven’t lived in the same city. It was also the first year in my season at North Phoenix that I was on my own. We both knew that I was living in his shadow here and that for me to come into my full potential, he would have to move on. That’s not why he left and I was incredibly saddened to say goodbye to him, but his departure did open the door for me to come into my own.

Tackling the teaching responsibility at Crash by myself intimidated me at first. Like most things I have not done before, I did not know how it was going to work out. But looking back on the biblical themes we explored (a theology of Risktaking, the Holy Spirit, Wisdom, the foundation for Lent, Heaven Hell and the End of the World), I am surprised how far my expectations were exceeded. God stretched me and grew me.

I probably gave some horrible talks along the way, but I also had some moments where I felt God’s presence tangibly as I wrote and gave my messages. In light of my experience in 2011, I have been reflecting on why I hid for so long before now. I see now that what was difficult and painful also became the process through which God transformed me, preparing me for future plans and purposes.

That’s the greatest thing we lose when we hide – transformation that doubles as preparation. When we hide in places where we are safe, when we hide in places where we minimize risk, when we hide in places far beneath our potential, we insulate ourselves from the very power that God uses to transform and shape us for things that are far beyond our imagination. In those moments, our fears get in the way of our dreams.

Part one of the solution to this problem is keeping the path to our dreams uncluttered by moving toward our fears, not away from them. 

Preparing and giving a message 3-4 Sunday nights a months as opposed to 2 Sunday nights a month was a difficult shift, especially when I was still working a second job at Starbucks. Yet, that constant challenge gave me the constant opportunity to evaluate past performance, ask for specific feedback, and make immediate changes for future improvement.

When we stay in a place that is overly safe or familiar, we begin to perceive change as unwarranted risk. The unknown becomes the home of fears instead of the path to our dreams. My dream is to one day pastor a local church. Not only to teach and preach, but shepherd, guide, strategize and cast vision. For too long, I shied away from places where I would be challenged or stretched. While I cannot say those times were wasted, I can say they were not fully engaged.

Part two of the solution in this area is to go public, so you can get encouragement and accountability. 

In 2012, my intention is to seek opportunities where I come out of hiding and expand. Where I reject fear and choose courage. Where I refuse to let my fears get in the way of my God-given dreams. I am apologizing less for the calling I feel in my life and striving for more focus on the issue of stewardship. The opportunities I have, my gifts, my talents – they are all a temporary gift from God, the use of which I will be accountable for.

The same goes for you too. So, if you feel a God-given dream growing inside of you, you have a stewardship over that dream or idea. The first step is probably not blogging about it, posting it on Facebook or tweeting it. However, you should share it with those you are close to and ask that community of people to begin encouraging you and holding you accountable for that.

When you do this, you give others the opportunity to help you move forward in this cause. Consider the Lord of the Rings storyline. When Frodo decides that he is taking the ring to Mordor, Sam and the others have the chance to fall in with him. Until Frodo made his intentions clear, they had nothing to hold him accountable to or encourage him about.

If your fears got in the way of your dreams in 2011, I believe something different can be true in 2012. But not in a magical way that requires no work on your end. Making your ideas happen is the hard part, but it is part of the great work God created us for.

So, join me in the new year as we reject our fears and move forward with faith, hope and courage.

This time last year I did not know it, but I was on the verge of a major meltdown on Christmas Eve. I came off a week of on call with three homicides and had no time to prepare for the season. Part of my preparation includes making many batches of raisin cinnamon bread. Ask anyone who has lived with me since college and they will tell you that the process of making the bread is what I love the most. And, I make a lot of it.

But, last year I was trying to work through the trauma I saw, my emotions and find the best gifts for the people who are most important to me. It was not until going to Midnight Mass that I finally found where Jesus was, and it was not for lack to trying to find him. Last year the process was hard and trying. This year has been no less busy, but I have a different perspective on my preparation.

At Crash we have been talking about the meaning of Advent and how each person in the Advent story was changed through the Advent of Jesus. Advent means coming or arrival. We wait and prepare for this time every year. Not unlike making bread from scratch. The flavor and texture is in the small details. It takes about 3 hours a batch from start to finish. Some people ask if I use a bread maker. I laugh and say no because I believe that is cheating. It cheats me out of the time to reflect and pay attention to the details and the people who will receive the bread. I want to know that each family is receiving the best and knows it.

Can you imagine if God had not waited to send Jesus? What if He had skipped the wait and the preparation? No Mary, no Joseph, no angels, no shepherds and no Magi.

In reflection, I can say that I most relate to the Magi each year when I prepare for Christmas. They watched for one thing and then went after it once they saw it. They found Jesus. But it was their search for Him that prepared them to actually meet Him, worship Him and present Him with their gifts.

Last year, it took me until after midnight on Christmas Day to be prepared for the coming of Jesus. This year it was different. Next year will be different again. But, it is never too late to prepare. If you are trapped, stressed, angry, scared or complacent, what can you do today for Advent?

(This blog is a guest post from Danalyn Savage, known by her friends as “Dani”.  Dani, an attorney who specializes in domestic violence, is married to Scott, who gives leadership to Crash. A native of western New York, Dani loves making and canning jam, watching hockey and introducing joy into the lives of her friends. This spring, she will become a mom for the first time.)

In every story of someone’s journey towards reconciling with God, there is a friend. A friend who doesn’t stop praying or sharing or inviting or loving or being present or being an example. A friend who doesn’t judge or condemn or lay guilt trips or act like they have it all together themselves. God makes reconciliation possible through Jesus’s death and resurrection, but He uses the friend in a powerful way.

Photo courtesy of sxc.hu (Photo #938486)

The power of friendship can change everything. This CNN article tells how friendship is changing perceptions and stereotypes in Egypt. My friend and mentor, Maxie Burch, has often said, “the fastest way to mess with your politics or religion is to meet someone from the other side of the aisle and decide that you like them.” In the fall of 2009, I taught a series at Crash called the Death of They, where we explored how “us vs. them” thinking runs counter to the testimony of the early church. Moving from “us vs. them” to “you & me” changes our worldview and conversations. Breaking the “us vs. them” barrier was a key piece of the Gospel’s expansion across the Roman Empire and ultimately the entire world. (You can download the series on iTunes by searching for Crash at North Phoenix.)

I told Dani last night about a line I heard I at a conference I attended last month. Pastor and author, Rick Warren, said, “you cannot win an enemy to Christ; you can only win a friend.” And then just last week, a friend of mine shared an insight from his recent reading of a biography of Abraham Lincoln. My friend shared how Lincoln placed members of the opposing party, even men and women who were diametrically opposed to him on important issues, on his cabinet. Yet Lincoln would look back on that time and call these people some of his closest friends, in spite of their passionate disagreements.

If the vast majority of people who are reconciled with God through Jesus Christ experience the love and presence of at least one Christ follower, then every Christ follower has incredible opportunities to be used by God. During this Christmas season, opportunities abound to be more vocal and intentional in our presence and friendship. We shouldn’t just be good friends during the holidays but every day. Yet, I think we get some unique experiences this time of year to talk about Jesus’ story to a more open audience.

This post and my post from yesterday re: a dream where Lady Gaga and Howard Stern are leaders of a church flow in a similar vein. Many, though not all, of the readers of this blog are followers of Jesus. I want all of us to consider what kind of presence you are going to live in the lives of others with the rest of the Christmas season and 2011.

If you are thinking about what “presence” might mean in the life of someone else, I strongly urge you to read this article about the friendship between an evangelical Christian leader and world-renowned atheist Christopher Hitchens. Hitchens passed away last week in Britain. I stumbled on this piece via Twitter over the weekend. In Hitchens’ story, there was a friend named Larry. Larry Taunton wrote the piece, reflecting on their friendship – one that seems surprising and unique for someone so passionately opposed to Christianity (and for that matter religion) and all it stood for.

Larry shares a surprising comment from Hitchens during their only public debate.

“When he was asked what he thought of me, a Christian, and an evangelical at that, Hitch replied: “’If everyone in the United States had the same qualities of loyalty and care and concern for others that Larry Taunton had, we’d be living in a much better society than we do.’”

Larry didn’t share whether Hitchens reconciled with His Creator and Sustainer before his death, after a long bout with cancer. However, I was overwhelmed at the power of their friendship and the unique impact it seemed to have had on Hitchens.

I believe that there is someone God has divinely enabled you to become friends with, for purposes beyond your ability to understand now. I believe that God is also calling you to be present in their life (like Larry was in Hitch’s) and trust Him for the results.

In every story, there is a friend.

In whose story are you supposed to be a friend?