It’s summer and what does that mean? I am not sure about you, but for me it means – graduations (including my own – SCORE!), weddings, unexpected funerals, parties, birthdays (including my own – DOUBLE SCORE), summer camps, bbq’s, pool time, and an overall different pace from the rest of the year.
In a couple of these experiences that I listed above, I have listened to others speak and a couple of their phrases – more like soundbites – are rolling around in my head. First, someone I heard recently describing a camp experience talked about his conviction that “you become like the God you worship. If you worship an angry bitter God, you become angry and bitter. If you worship a God of love and compassion, then you become generous and forgiving.” Second, I was at a graduation today and the main speaker shared about how Christians fight over the Lord’s Supper/Communion/Eucharist. He was speaking to a diverse crowd theologically and denominationally. He said “this is not the table of our school or Presbyterians or Pentecostals or Methodists or Baptist; this is the Lord’s table. We could bicker about the presence or lack of ‘real presence’ here, but the greatest question is how did you and I come to be invited by God to eat of this bread and drink of this cup?”
Now, you may be saying at this point, Savage, have you nothing else to do with your time? Well, yes and no. Yes, I am blogging while waiting for a computer to finish a project which I cannot make go faster. No, I am captivated by strange ideas that others bat away like an annoying fly or mosquito. The first idea challenged me to consider if I have limited who God is and began to fashion him in my image. I am also challenged to consider if I am as open to God continuing to transform me as I have led myself to believe I really am. The second idea reminds me that I can play theological ping pong, but at the end of the day, if I have lost my sense of wonder about how I am a loved created child of God that Jesus came to redeem and restore, then I need to go on a search to rediscover my imagination and wonder.
I probably ask too many questions and reassess things that have already been established, but I am constantly aware of my own ability to deceive myself, to be more vulnerable than I would like to admit. I read the story of a pastor whose blog I read a couple of times a month. He resigned his role as pastor of that church – a church he planted this decade, and his resignation came on the heels of his admission to an affair with his assistant. My first thoughts were “Ugh” and “Bleh” – you know that disgusting sick to your stomach feeling…and then I realized that I am just as vulnerable as this man.
I hope I continue to slow down long enough to chew on what I hear and what sticks with me, the stuff that challenges me to stay on my toes, to continue to grow. I want to finish this race called life and I don’t want the trajectory of my life to be de-railed because I got lazy or conceited.
-Savage